Its midnight here now and I cant put these thought off my mind. This would help anyone in a premarital relationship.
Now that you found someone you like, you have the butterfly thing going, now what? People say its good to get to know each other before you start planning a wedding but how?
The following questions would guide your conversations. This is not meant to be done all-at-once and definitely not like an interview. But if you know the answer to most of these question you can say that you know the person to a large extent.
Your personal faith
- Do you believe in God?
- What kind of relationship do you have with God
- Would you want me to help you understand God better? How?
- What do you think God’s plan for your life is and how would I come in?
- Are you committed to any religious organisation
Your background
- How present was your boilogical father while you were growin up?
- What kind of relationship did/ do you have with your bilogical Mom
- Are there other persons (man/woman) that play these crucial roles in your life
- How many siblings do you have, where are they and what do they do.
- Do you have any important extended family member that is very important to you, why?
- How did you grow up, did you have sleep overs, vacations, home school, field trips, camps…
- Was God a part of your family while your were growing up
Education
- What was your favourite high school subject and why
- Are you done with formal education or not
- What other educational process would you want to take on.
Career
- Is the job you have now your desired job
- if you had all the money you need to pay your bills for the next 3 yrs what would you be doing?
- Are you a career oriented person
- Do you think you will work till age 65
- What brings meaning to your life?
- How do you find the people you work with
Sexual
- What do you know about sex
- Would you love abstinence before marriage
- How do you think we can achieve that
- Have you ever hurt someone’s feelings emotionally
- Did you settle the issue with them
- Do you have children from past relationships, how often do you see your child
Financial
- Do you have any major debt
- How much do you make annually
- Do you give to any charitable organization
- What’s your ideal income level? Huge and enough to live a normal life
Some Final Extra Questions
- How long do you think you will stay longer in the city you live in
- Do you like travelling
- Would you love to go on a mission trip, where
I will love to stop here to rest my eyes for the day. I will try to add to the list later.
Hello Ade,
these are great questions, and I can really see them helping you getting to know others. I believe asking such question prior to marriage could have saved some people a lot of heartache, money and stress from breaking up or even divorce. It amazes me how some people claim to know each other, but have never touched on any of these questions. I believe that, for one reason or the other, people rush into marriage, and its only when they’ve been in the marriage for a year or two that the eyes open to the reality of it.
Thanks for the guideline, some of these questions I have thought about already but quite a few of them are new to me, and I am glad that I have become aware of them prior to finding myself in a marriage where it would be too late to start asking these questions.
Keep up the great work.